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  “Hello.” A child stopped on the sidewalk, spraddle-legged on her bike.

  “Hello there. I’m Priory, and you are…?”

  “Tracy. You living with them now?”

  “Them?” Priory glanced back at Jacey as if looking for confirmation. “Who’s them?”

  “You know … them. The ghosts,” Tracy whispered.

  “Ghosts? I haven’t seen any ghosts. Have you, Jacey?”

  Jacey quickly shook her head.

  “You will. They’ll cut off your heads, you know,” she said gleefully. “Bye.”

  “We’ll have treats tonight. Tell your friends,” Priory called as the girl cycled away from them. “What did you make of that?”

  Jacey carried the box into the house. “Neighborhood gossip.” Did she really want to push Priory’s anxiety into high gear? “But I did some checking this afternoon. It appears there are rumors that the house is haunted.”

  Priory sighed. “That explains the price I paid for it. The real estate guy didn’t mention it.”

  “Maybe he assumed you knew.” Or he chickened out. “I thought they had to report that sort of thing.”

  “Apparently not. They must have seen me coming.”

  “Or they were blinded by the dollar signs of their commission,” Jacey mumbled.

  “Sorry?”

  “Nothing.” Jacey walked outside to fetch another box out of the trunk. The sooner she moved Priory in, the sooner she could get back to her own life. “You could help.”

  “What’s the hurry?” Priory had snuck up on her and whispered in her ear. Jacey convulsed from the fright.

  “Don’t do that!” Jacey’s hand rose to her chest.

  “Not scared of a little ghost now, are you?”

  “Weren’t you just complaining about the house fighting back?” Jacey countered, trying to divert the conversation away from food and romance. “You remember? Doors and lamps and magazines, as I recall. I’m not the one living here.” She brushed past Priory and made her way to the front door with another box.

  The latest packing case was heavy and Jacey could feel the beginnings of a hernia coming on. She strained with the substantial load, her legs quivering every step of the way. By the time she had the box on the floor, she was shaking so violently she felt light-headed.

  For Christ’s sake, sit down!

  This time she didn’t argue with her voices. She barely made it to the sofa before her knees collapsed and she sprawled over the seat.

  Nice….

  Jacey mentally stuck out her tongue at herself. Her girls were not allowed to comment on the maneuver. When you do the work, then you can criticize.

  Okay.

  Does she realize she’s talking to herself?

  What do you think I am? An idiot?

  No … crazy … bonkers … loopy … unhinged … stark raving mad … but not an idiot.

  And don’t forget my personal favorite—nutty as a fruitcake.

  I’m rather partial to “one sandwich short of a picnic”.

  Squirrelly.

  Oh yeah! That’s a good one!

  Off her rocker … mad as a hatter….

  “Enough!” Jacey yelled out loud.

  Out of your tree.

  “I am not crazy!”

  “I didn’t say you were,” Priory answered, giving her a perplexed look. “You having doubts?”

  Jacey rubbed her face with her hands and sighed. “No,” she said in resignation. “I’m just frustrated.”

  “Frustrated?” In a flash, Priory was seated next to her on the sofa. “Maybe I can help.” Her lascivious grin made Jacey’s girls pipe up again.

  Lecherous … lewd … lustful.

  Don’t do this to me. Jacey resorted to her trump card. Please.

  Libidinous.

  Libidinous? Where did her voices come up with these words?

  Sex, Jace. In case you didn’t know what that means.

  Yeah, it’s been so long we’ve all forgotten what it looks like, let alone what it feels like. We’re sex-starved.

  Jay is right. We need input. We want it all—smutty, indecent, ribald, salacious—so much so that we don’t want to be able to walk again until morning.

  Where did they get all these ideas? Certainly not from her. Maybe it was that slutty little stenographer, Jayde, sitting in the back corner of her mind. Always making snide and lubricious comments at an inappropriate time.

  Jay, Jacine, and Janey, I want you to instruct Jayde on the rules of the house. No more smutty innuendo.

  Jayde never listens to us, you know that. Besides, she’s only voicing what we all think about.

  “Oh God!” Jacey moaned.

  “Are you hurt?” Priory’s hand moved to her knee and slowly caressed it.

  “N … n … no.” Jacey lost her power of speech and stuttered. She wanted to bat the hand away, but her mind rebelled. Jayde seemed to have executed a coup and she wasn’t going anywhere. The touch expanded to include part of her upper leg, and one word appeared in her mind’s eye: horny. In big neon letters and glittering like a Christmas tree.

  “You look a little shook up,” Priory said in a low voice. “Anything I can do?”

  “How…?” Jacey’s voice broke. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “How about we go find dinner?”

  Priory glanced at her watch. “Sure, we can do that, though I’m not sure what will be open at four p.m.”

  “Oh.” Jacey could feel herself being neatly corralled by her boss into a corner. Oh, indeed.

  Boxes. You need to find boxes.

  And do what? Pack yourself in one? Shove Little Miss Prickly in it and seal it. The tape won’t hold her.

  Stop fighting it. Get your ass “fix”, then we can all move on.

  But Jacey knew it wasn’t that simple. Love was going to play a part somewhere in this mess and there might be no turning back. She didn’t want to use sex to get her “fix”, as one of her girls so bluntly put it, so her only safe option was to abstain. Her only worry was whether she had the strength to resist.

  She drew her mind back to the conversation. “Better to find out now, I suppose. It gives us more time to search for an open gas station.”

  “God!” Priory’s body shook. “Surely, it won’t come to that!”

  Jacey shrugged. “You never know.”

  “Come on, it’s only Halloween. Macys are open on Christmas Day, for Christ’s sake!”

  “No they’re not.”

  “They’re not? I was so sure….” Priory shook her head. “I’m definitely losing it.”

  Without comment Jacey stood and walked into the kitchen to grab the keys. “Let’s go,” she said as she passed by her recumbent boss.

  Chapter Six

  Priory peeked through the living room curtain at the street. “Are you sure they know we’re open for business?”

  “I don’t know what more we can do, apart from a huge neon sign saying, ‘Get your candy here’.”

  “Can we do that?” Jacey glared at her. “Just asking. No need to get snitty.” Priory glanced out and spotted a small group of children standing on the sidewalk. “Ah! Customers!” She dashed to the front door and threw it open. “Hey there! Want some candy?”

  The children stared at her, then ran away screaming like banshees.

  “What?” She turned to face Jacey. “What? What did I do?”

  Jacey sighed. “Maybe living in the suburbs isn’t for you.”

  “It’s a little late for that. What did I do wrong? The kids want candy and I want to give it to them, so what’s the problem?”

  “There are certain protocols to be observed.”

  “Protocols?” Priory grinned. “When did you get so intellectual?”

  “Do you want to give out candy or not? I can simply turn off the porch light—”

  “No, no. Continue. Enlighten me.” Priory leaned against the doorjamb and continued to smile.

  Jacey pursed her lips. “You just can’t fling ope
n the door and yell, ‘Want some candy?’ Because what just happened will happen.”

  “Tell me something new.”

  “You have to let them come to the door and ring the doorbell.”

  “But they’re not doing that.”

  “True. We … you have a ghost problem. You may have to sit outside and offer it that way.”

  “Outside? But it’s getting cold outside.”

  “No pain, no gain.”

  “Fine.”

  Jacey could see that Priory had reached the end of her tolerance. Her boss emerged with a kitchen chair and slammed it down with a certain amount of hostility. Priory stuck out her ass as she took a seat, and Jacey couldn’t help but feel a flush of lust.

  Jacey reached inside to get the large bowl of candy. “You may need this.”

  Priory looked from the bowl to Jacey’s face. “And what will you be doing?”

  “Well, I thought I might have a cup of coffee, then see what’s on the television.”

  “Oh no.” Priory started to rise, but Jacey put a hand on her shoulder and pushed her back.

  “This is your neighborhood, so be neighborly. Win them over.”

  Jacey walked back inside to the sounds of Priory stuttering, “But … but … but … but….”

  Why did she have to constantly remind her?

  †

  Priory looked down at the bowl in frustration. Jacey had refused to help, so it seemed she was in for the long haul. “I can do this,” she muttered. Board meetings and company sharks, she could handle those. How hard could it be for a bunch of pint-sized adults?

  “Are you a ghost?”

  Priory looked up from her inspection of the bowl’s contents. “Sorry?”

  “You’re one of them.” A rather defiant-looking, dark-haired midget stood on the sidewalk, courageously looking at her.

  “Them? No! I live here.”

  “Yeah, one of them.”

  “I am not one of them. I bought the house recently and just moved in.”

  The girl swiveled her head to her smaller companion. “See? I told ya.”

  The other girl grinned up at her. “You were right,” she said adoringly.

  Priory couldn’t hear her clearly, but the nodding of her head affirmed she was agreeing with her mop-topped pal.

  “Once and for all, I am not a ghost,” Priory said, her voice rising in volume.

  The dark-haired girl placed herself in front of her friend, as if to protect her.

  “Do you want candy or not?” Priory had just about had enough of her neighbors.

  The two girls hesitated. Priory was tempted to just throw the candy at them, but she suspected she might throw it harder than she should. The last thing she needed right now was to be arrested for candy abuse.

  “Well?” Stay calm, kiddo. “Come on, I won’t bite.” Strangle, on the other hand, was a distinct possibility.

  The dark-haired girl slowly walked up the path to where Priory sat, her younger companion waiting nervously on the sidewalk. As she approached, her walk slowed to a hesitant step, one by one, until the bowl was within her reach.

  The girl reached in to grab a handful and Priory reacted. “Boo!” she barked before she lunged forward. The girl on the sidewalk screamed and, with a shudder, the older girl grabbed her candy and ran. She stopped next to the little girl and put half the candy in her friend’s container.

  She glared at Priory. “You’re a mean lady!”

  “Yeah? Well at least I’m not a ghost!” Priory yelled back.

  “C’mon, Gabby,” the dark-haired girl said before claiming her friend’s hand and walking off with some dignity.

  Priory was impressed. At least they didn’t run off screaming.

  The front door opened abruptly. “Hey,” Priory chirped.

  “And this is your idea of fun?”

  She was in trouble. “Yeah. They were being mean to me.”

  “Those kids?”

  “Everyone in general. No one wanted my candy…” Priory saw the annoyance in Jacey’s eyes. “…your candy.”

  “That’s no reason to send them screaming into the street.”

  “May I point out that she didn’t scream? She and her little friend walked away quite calmly.”

  “You’ve probably scarred them for life.”

  “You’re exaggerating.” Jacey stared at her. “Aww, Jace, don’t look at me like that. Me and kids don’t mix.”

  “Obviously. Here, give it to me.”

  Priory looked down at the bowl, contemplating whether she would hand the candy over. She hadn’t thought she was a coward, but all those kids passing by instilled in her a certain amount of trepidation, which was foreign to her.

  Okay, so it turned out that kids were harder to handle than boardroom cronies. She had fought for everything she got in life, not like said cronies, so was this any different? She sighed deeply as she steeled herself for a couple more hours of torture. “No, I can handle this.”

  Jacey’s expression told her what she thought about that statement.

  “I wouldn’t say no to a coffee, though. Thanks.”

  Jacey turned and entered the house, and Priory’s gaze dropped to the shapely ass outlined in soft denim. Then there was that….

  Something wet hit her in the head. She turned and three cherubic faces came into view, followed by a fourth, whose expression made him look like the Devil incarnate.

  “Trick or treat,” he said silkily. He held up his hand and displayed an egg sitting in it.

  “Hey! No fair!” Priory complained. “Here’s your damned treats!” She held out the bowl and waited for them to take their booty.

  “Oooh! She swore! I’m telling on you!”

  “I did not … take them.” Something slid down her forehead before falling into her lap. She looked down and saw part of an eggshell. Priory looked murderously at the child with the egg and she narrowed her eyes. He grinned and tossed the egg in the air. “That was not very nice.” Her jaw started to ache from the pressure of her clenched teeth.

  “Too slow, lady.”

  “Slow? I’m sitting here with the treats. How slow is that?”

  “We said ‘trick or treat’ three times. You didn’t answer, so I tricked ya!”

  She really wanted to take down this potential criminal, but she couldn’t do it. Her mind had been elsewhere—Jacey’s ass to be exact—and she hadn’t seen the kids until it was too late. She knew whose fault it was—Jacey’s.

  “Do you want candy or not?” The bowl started to get heavy and her arms burned with the effort of holding it up. The three younger kids ran up and grabbed the candy with glee while the troublemaker sauntered, his posture dripping with arrogance, before dipping his hand into the bowl and running his fingers through the candy. He lifted his hand, and the sweets dripped down like water back into the bowl. He did this twice more before grabbing a handful and shoving them into his sack. Their gazes met for a moment and Priory knew that this kid would grow up to be a “boardroom shark” or, worse, a politician.

  He strutted back to the sidewalk.

  “Hey! What do you say?” Priory asked.

  The three kids yelled back in chorus, “Thank you. Happy Halloween!”

  The older kid snapped his fingers and said, “Catch ya later!”

  If Priory ever wanted to have kids she would remember this moment.

  †

  The coffee did little to appease her simmering frustration. Neither did the second cup … nor the third. When the caffeine high wore off for the last time, Priory called it quits. She thought she had about a third of the candy left and figured she and Jacey could work their way through that. The sound of noisy kids slowly wound down as nine o’clock approached. She put the bowl on the chair and carried them back inside.

  “Thank God that’s over.” She placed the chair against the wall and switched off the porch light. As she turned, two figures stood at the bottom of the stairs.

  “Jee … zus! You scared the
hell out of me!” Priory said it loud enough to bring Jacey running. “What are you doing here? Don’t you know it’s bad manners to come into someone’s house without being asked?”

  The two crudely crafted ghosts in white sheets turned to look at one another. They turned back to face her and said, “Sorry.”

  “All right, just this time. Hold out your hands.” The sheets complied and Priory put a handful of sweets in each. There was silence for a moment or two. “Well, what do you say?”

  The sheets looked down at the candy, then at each other again, before returning their hollow gazes back to her. “Thank you.”

  Priory opened the door. “Now, off you go.”

  Instead of going out the door, the two sheets started to climb the stairs. Priory looked more closely at one of them. The sheet had impressive bumps where the breasts should have been. “Hey!” The sheets stopped and turned. “Aren’t you a bit old to be trick-or-treating?”

  One cloth-covered hand rose and pointed to its chest.

  “Not you, shorty. The other one. The one with the big … errr … you know.” Priory waved her finger through the air, circling in the general direction of the ghost’s breasts. She then realized they were going upstairs instead of leaving.

  “What’s going on?” Priory said to Jacey, who stood there frozen. “Are you okay? You don’t look so good.” Jacey lifted a shaking finger and pointed to the stairs. “Yeah, I know. Damned rude if you ask me.”

  “No, no feet. Look.”

  “No feet? You’re taking this Halloween thing a bit too seriously.”

  Jacey grabbed Priory’s chin and pointed her head, and vision, in the direction of the ghosts. The sheets hovered a few inches above the stairs. No feet, no … nothing. It took a moment for her to put all the pieces together. “How did they do that? Pretty clever.”

  “Yeah, if you’re dead.”

  “De—dead?”

  The ghosts finished climbing the stairs and disappeared.

  “Hey!” she yelled at the top of her voice. “I want my candy back!” A small avalanche of wrapped sweets sailed through the air from the first floor and rained down on them both. “Smart-asses.”

  “I need a drink.” Jacey’s voice quivered a little.

  “It’ll sure beat coffee,” Priory agreed. This changed everything.